it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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