I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
