they need to just BURY HIM!
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
