i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I just want to make out with him forever
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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