I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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