Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
