i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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