I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
