So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
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