I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
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