check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
