Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
