how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
