I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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