I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
