So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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