She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize