No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
