She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
