Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Randomize
