um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
