Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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