I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
