I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
