well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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