Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize
