My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
