remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
