Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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