You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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