It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
