We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
