Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
and you said cock pushups were impossible
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
