im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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