Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
