I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize