I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
