sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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