You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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