I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
