Got a toothbrush?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
