Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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