So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize