Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
