WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
