I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
