I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
