their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Don't make out with my wife yet
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Randomize
