shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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