Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
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