The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
